Friday Funnies

Posted June 26th, 2008 at 10:06 PM by Joan Dykstra

Humor

Joan Dykstra's blog

On June 26th, 2008 at 10:14 PM, Joan Dykstra said:

On June 26th, 2008 at 11:14 PM, John Farney said:

In memory of George Carlin . . . . Euphemisms.

And as George would have said, if you are offended by the language he uses, listen to somebody else.

On June 27th, 2008 at 07:08 AM, Anonymous (not verified) said:

"And as George would have said, if you are offended by the language he uses, listen to somebody else."

Unless it is an anonymous poster. Then you won't have to listen even long enough to ignore the post.

Censorship, excuse me "queued moderation", was not what Carlin was all about.

It is sad times we now live in, branding people "trolls" when they merely disagree or are provocative or even a bit rude.

RIP Mr. Carlin.

On June 27th, 2008 at 08:00 AM, B is for Business said:

This is just childish...

On June 27th, 2008 at 08:39 AM, IlliniPundit said:

"Unless it is an anonymous poster. Then you won't have to listen even long enough to ignore the post.

Censorship, excuse me "queued moderation", was not what Carlin was all about."

Nope. But I'm not George Carlin.

And I'm perfectly willing to listen to other solutions to the trolling problem if you have any ideas. I'm not happy with moderating comments either; I have much better things to do.

On June 27th, 2008 at 08:45 AM, Anonymous (not verified) said:

Here's a solution,

grow a thicker skin and quit censoring people. Wahhhh, I'm so upset because somebody I don't know said something mean. Wahhhh!

On June 27th, 2008 at 09:35 AM, cheesy poofs said:

Walt Handelsman Newsday

Jim Borgman Cincinnati Enquirer (Drawn and published before George Carlin's death)

Dana Summers Orlando Sentinel

On June 27th, 2008 at 10:56 AM, IlliniPundit said:

"grow a thicker skin and quit censoring people. Wahhhh, I'm so upset because somebody I don't know said something mean. Wahhhh!"

My skin is plenty thick, thank you very much. I don't think I've ever deleted a comment which insulted me. Frankly, I'm flattered that anyone would go to the effort of thinking I'm important enough to insult.

The reason anonymous comments are moderated isn't because someone said something mean about me. It's because we had a handful of people who were actively working to prevent discussion through insulting other commenters.

And, as I said, if you have a better solution for how to encourage enough civility among non-registered users to allow for reasonable disagreements during a discussion, I'm all for it.

On June 27th, 2008 at 12:48 PM, Arvid said:

In other news, proof that Supply-Side Economics actually works: Reaganomics finally trickle-down to an area man.

-----
At some point we have to trust the government. - redstatewannabe on 2008-06-12 at 1:14pm

On June 27th, 2008 at 01:51 PM, Anonymous (not verified) said:

My first thought upopn reading Arvid's link was "Who the heck reads The Onion?" But then it hit me that it's probably the kind of person who works in a car wash.

On June 27th, 2008 at 03:23 PM, Anonymous (not verified) said:

My first thought upopn reading Arvid's link was "Who the heck reads The Onion?" But then it hit me that it's probably the kind of person who works in a car wash.

I agree... those car wash peopel must be so dumn that they enjoy something that is hilarious, thoughtful and clever. i'm ma superior being who doesn't real at all, becasue it's all beneath me -- and I'm certainly nbever go to read anything that might chnage my mind

On June 27th, 2008 at 04:12 PM, Anonymous (not verified) said:

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

BARACK OBAMA:
The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!

JOHN MC CAIN:
My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON:
When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure -- right from Day One! -- that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.......

DR. PHIL:
The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems..

OPRAH:
Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

GEORGE W. BUSH:
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL:
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...

ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY:
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it..

NANCY GRACE:
That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART:
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die in the rain. Alone.

GRANDPA:
In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS:
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON:
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book.
Internet Explorer is an integral part of the Chicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% .......... reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken??

AL GORE:
I invented the chicken!

COLONEL SANDERS:
Did I miss one?

DICK CHENEY:
Where's my gun?

AL SHARPTON:
Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

On June 27th, 2008 at 04:18 PM, Joan Dykstra said:

"I know it was you, Fredo."

(from The Godfather)

On June 28th, 2008 at 04:52 AM, Glock21 said:

Anon 1:51 said: "My first thought upopn reading Arvid's link was "Who the heck reads The Onion?" But then it hit me that it's probably the kind of person who works in a car wash."

The Onion is America's finest news source...